Sony Pictures Home Entertainment
Release date: June 17th, 2008
MSRP: $19.94

Director: Thomas Schlamme
Stars: Mike Myers, Nancy Travis, Anthony LaPaglia, Amanda Plummer, Alan Arkin

So I married an ax murderer is an unusual film, if only because Mike Myers plays the straight man in it. But that is not the only unusual thing about this offbeat flick.

Mike plays a San Francisco beat poet that has issues with intimacy. Every time he gets close to a girl, he finds a reason to break it off (One, he tells us, smelled like soup.).

One afternoon, Charlie stops to pick up some haggis. He meets Harriet, a lovely butcher. Charlie is smitten and the two start spending time together.

After arguing about the Weekly World News (May it rest in peace) with his mother, Charlie finds himself suspecting his new gal of being a murderer. Said paper had an article about Mrs. X, a lady that kills her husbands on the honeymoon.

Charlie breaks things off, only to find out somebody has confessed to the killings. It is at this time that Charlie comes to realize that he loves Harriet and needs to overcome his fears and win her back.

Eventually Charlie and Harriet are reunited and become engaged. Of course there is a twist, but to say more would spoil the film.

SImaaM also features Antony LaPaglia as Charlie’s cop buddy Tony. Tony is unhappy with his job because he thought becoming a copy would be more like Serpico, whereas he feels like Fish from Barney Miller.

Alan Arkin is great as Tony’s boss. Tony’s wants him to be gruffer so he fits the cop film clichés of what the police chief is like. Amanda Plummer plays Harriet’s very strange sister. Has Plummer ever had a role that was not odd?

Just because I have no word limit on the blog, here is the interaction between the police chief and Tony:
Police Chief: [noticing Tony is depressed] Tony? I don’t want to intrude, but you seem a little down.

Tony Giardino: Well, Captain, it’s about my job.
Police Chief: Ah.
[sits down with Tony]
Tony Giardino: I’m having doubts about being a cop. You know, it’s not like how it is on TV. All I do all day is fill out forms and paperwork. I mean, this is what I do.
Police Chief: [contemplates] It’s a point well taken, Tony. But you must understand, although it’s not exciting, it’s a very important part of our work.
Tony Giardino: Yeah, but in all my times as a cop, I’ve never gotten to, like, chase a guy across a crowded city square. I’ve never… I’ve never hung on to that part of a helicopter. You know that part? Underneath the thing that it lands? Do you, do you know that part?
Police Chief: Yes, I know that part.
Tony Giardino: I’ve never hung onto that. I’ve never even commandeered a vehicle.
Police Chief: Now *that* sounds like a lot of fun.
Tony Giardino: And that’s the other thing. You’re too nice.
Police Chief: I’m too nice?
Tony Giardino: Yeah, you’re too nice. Why can’t you be like the Captain on “Starsky and Hutch”? You know, when you come in, and you haul me into your office, and you bawl me out because you’re sick and tired of defending my screwball antics to the Commissioner? Why cant you do that?
Police Chief: Well, the truth of the matter is, I don’t report to a Commissioner. I report to a committee. Some of whom are appointed, some elected, and the rest co-opted on a bi-annual basis. It’s a quorum, so to speak.
Tony Giardino: A quorum?
Police Chief: Yeah.
Tony Giardino: Captain, when I joined the police force, I thought I was going to be Serpico. But instead, I’m like… Fish from Barney Miller.
Police Chief: Hey. Somebody needs a hug!

Extras: THERE ARE NONE. That is correct, we have a “special edition” with no freakin’ extras! If the film has been remastered, call it the remastered edtion not “special edition. The industry in general needs to cut back on using terms like Special Edition and Collector’s edition. They hand us releases with very little extras and slap on a label because it sounds good. This practice is disgusting and does little more than mislead the consumer.

While I would not call So I…a great film (or even a really good film), I do enjoy it. I find the characters entertaining, especially LaPaglia and Arkin. Ax Murderer is the kind of film you blow a weekend afternoon on. An entertaining triffle.

Order So I married an axe Murderer from Amazon.

Jeremy Lynch