The United States of Murder, Inc. with Kate (and Dan)

::Our scene opens with Kate (and Dan) wrapping up their semi-annual, only during the eclipse that coincides with the equinox viewing of GOODFELLAS and SCARFACE::

K: Ch… chainsaw? They used a ch… chainsaw on that guy?

D: You say that every time we watch this movie!

K: It was really splattery. It’s always really splattery.

D: But then the mob guys slip up, and Johnny Law ends up busting up all the fun. These guys? These guys are just trying to get their piece of the Dream. And those government dopes end up spoiling everything! What do those jerks know about honor? Pfft. That’s what.

K: Pfft?

D: Pfft.

K: Say it, don’t spray it.

D: Shut up. Just once, I wanna see the story go the mob guys way. Is that so wrong? Honor. Family. Tradition. What does it take to see the Family win?

K: You shut up. And here, dummy. Brian Michael Bendis and Michael Avon Oeming must have also been having a movie marathon, ‘cause their latest creator-owned work answers that very question.

D: That was one hell of a segue.



D: Well now. THE UNITED STATES OF MURDER, INC. does lay out what life would be like if the law took a backseat and The Mob ruled the East Coast. Life seems a little…rough without the uniformed lawmen.

K: Bendis and Oeming introduce us to Valentine Gallo, the newest made man in one of the ruling mobs. He goes through a brief ceremony…

D: … like his Bar Mitzvah?

K: Same idea. Then BOOM! Made guy and a party. His dad was a mob guy, so Valentine’s a, you know, legacy mob guy.

D: On his first day as a made-man, Valentine is tasked with going to Washington, D.C. to deliver a package for the family. He brings his mess-up cousin with him on the trip.

K: Not a good idea. He loves his cousin and trusts him to watch his back, but still. It’s never a good idea to bring the mess-up cousin, no matter what. Doesn’t matter if you’re a mob guy, a fraternity guy, or a regular guy without an affiliation: just don’t bring the mess-up cousin. Trust me.

D: What are you talking about? I’ve met your family and there aren’t any mess-up cousins.

K: I legally can’t talk about it or ever go back to Oklahoma. And we’ll just leave it at that.

D: ::rolls eyes:: Back to our made man, Valentine. On his first trip out of what are known as “The Territories” and on the train to DC he meets a mysterious red head.

K: ::tousling her hair:: All of us red heads are mysterious.

D: And, um. Curvy, too.

K: My eyes are up here. Well, the red head helps Valentine navigate his trip to D.C. Kinda like a bodyguard? Because then, everything goes…

D: …pear shaped. This is when we get to the meat of the book. We start to get a glimpse into what the New York Mob is plotting, as well as the forces outside of the Territories.

K: It’s at this point that Bendis drops two of the biggest plot twists I’ve ever come across.

D: No kidding. Usually with a new on-going series, you need to sit through at least a few issues before you get to the juicy parts. But MURDER INC. hits the ground running. And with Bendis’ partner-in-crime Oeming handling the art, you know you’re getting a quality book.

K: I love this art. It has an animated style, but I sure wouldn’t show it to little kids. There’s some naughty stuff in there. The panels are laid out in an interesting manner, the point of view changes up as needed. This is just a really, really good looking book.

D: ::points to bookshelves overflowing with POWERS trades:: These guys have been putting out quality crime books since 2000. If there’s one thing I know, if someone asks me “What’s a good comic I should read?” I give them a Bendis/Oeming book.

K: And now, you can give them UNITED STATES OF MURDER INC, too.